but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize