pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize