everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
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I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I just want to make out with him forever
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
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Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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