is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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