it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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