i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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