i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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