Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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