she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn off my feet"
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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