What did we do last night that was yellow?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize