Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
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You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
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Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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