addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
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she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
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I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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