don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
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he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I need a burrito and a hug.
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Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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