I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
3 2 1 whiskey
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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