you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize