I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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