My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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