I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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