There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Randomize