Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
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I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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