Cold hands, warm shart.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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