What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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