I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize