Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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