alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick very happy bro
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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