i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
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once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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