Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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