if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize