Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize