i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize