I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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