i can't believe i had my finger in that
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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