I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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