I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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