I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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