first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize