so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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