This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
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