Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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