I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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