i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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