Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
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You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
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body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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