Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
if only i could text you this smell
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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