I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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