dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize