i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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