the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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