I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize