Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
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