need another drink. this is the easiest way
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize